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Monday, 27 January 2014

The Pitch

A week or so ago, there was a story in the papers that the snakes were out in force and heading to the new water park in Western Sydney. (Story here). I have a movie idea, a sequel in fact, that's bound to be a hit. However, as I can't be bothered writing it, I thought I'd give my pitch and someone can run with it - I am aware story ideas can't be copyrighted, so when you make your millions, do the right thing and send me some champagne or pay my hefty parking bill, which I'm still grieving over.

So, in short: The snakes get into the water park and all hell breaks loose - Samuel L Jackson just happens to be chasing some escapee in fun park, because it's a sequel, you see. So the snakes are killing everyone, including in gratuitous sex scenes and then the moment everyone is waiting for, Mr Jackson yells "I want these mother-f***ing snakes off this mother f***ing slide!".

Working title is Snakes on a Slide or Red Bellied Black Park (after the famous Australian Red Bellied Black Snakes, to avoid confusion for those out of Oz). I'm sure someone could do better than that but I'm also sure they don't need to. The tricky part in this getting Mr Jackson to agree, as it really doesn't work without him.
Brilliance, right? Pure Hollywood Gold! (I don't know why gold has a capital, it just needed one).

Linking up with Essentially Jess for IBOT

For the record, I've seen that movie twice so I'm not making fun of it. I'm serious. Deadly Snakes on the loose serious...


34 comments:

  1. Argh. I think my comment just got eaten, so here's another. Just delete one if there's two.

    Love it! I personally think snakes on a slide is a great title. I can't say I'll watch it though because I LIVE IN FEAR OF SNAKES. My husband is constantly opening the house up ready for any slippery little sucker to slide right in. I am on constant guard!

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    1. We've had one in the living room of the yha we were in (teens left door open). It was HUGE!

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  2. Here's some dialogue for you.
    Young girl "Aaaaaaaaargh - there's a huge snake in your pants!"
    Boy "No baby you just look hawt in your bikini"

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    1. I'm sure there'd be plenty of opportunities for that kind of thing, and that would make it more popular with the target audience. Do you think 'trouser snake' is Universal or an Australian oddity?

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  3. Ewwww my skin is crawling at the idea of snakes in a water park eeek.

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  4. This is obviously a movie that just has to be brought to life, Lydia!
    No doubt you'll be contacted by SLJ once the word gets out. Snakes On A Slide, for sure :)

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    1. I hope so. I'm sure someone will write it...it will be a smash!

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    2. Apparently they wanted to call Snakes on a Plane something else (that was the working title) and he insisted it had to be Snakes on a Plane, or he wouldn't do it...

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  5. I can totally see it become a movie! I watched one about snakes on the plane... Arrrgggghhh!!

    Ai @ Sakura Haruka

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    2. I might delete that bit of bad parenting....

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  6. I don't think I will be watching that movie but I hope you make a heap of money when someone picks up the idea and runs with it !!!
    Have a great week !
    Me

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    1. Now you have to go and watch it - it's my movie idea...! ;)

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  7. I'm going to the pool tomorrow and now thanks to this I will be on the look out for snakes lol. You're right it needs Samuel L Jackson or it would be totally B grade.

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    1. Has to be SLJ. I suspect it will still be B Grade, but that's the appeal. (No disrespect - you are everybody's favourite tough guy)

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  8. Hahaha! *snort* Hells yeah, that's an awesome pitch! Giggling my head off at the other replies!

    MC xo

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    1. It is awesome. Some one will make it. I just hope they chuck me a few bucks or some champagne...just so I have a good dinner table story...

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  9. That movie was such a laugh! I seriously couldn't believe they made a movie out of it!! I love snakes! I hold them at zoos and 'wild' parties whenever I get the chance!! The movie had the same effect as kittens on a plane for me!! Meow!

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    1. I like them too, but that anaconda was huge!!

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  10. Just the thought of snakes makes me shudder!

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  11. Gosh I cannot stand snakes, horror movies and water parks - so I am a hopeless judge if this would be a hit or not! xx

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  12. Hee hee I'll be sure to credit you! I don't really fear snakes but maybe that's cos I was born in NZ!

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    1. In your capable hands it will be a huge hit! Better than the original.

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  13. Ha ha ha, gold! Or should that be Gold? ;) While I was in hospital with Mercedes last week my sister was texting me blow-by-blow updates of a movie she was watching in which sharks took over LA. I kinda like that idea, sharks are cool right?

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    1. SLJ has done a shark movie too...maybe I could come up with a sequel for that too...

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  14. Hahaha Snakes on a Slide sounds awesome! My parents are staying at a resort at the moment and there is signs everywhere saying that there have been snake sightings. My Dad (yes my Dad) is freaking the fuck out and nearly runs from the pool to their hotel room lol

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    1. Oh, which resort? (announce after they've left ) That sounds crazy! There was a dead mouse in the outdoor bathroom in Bali and I went and got the made who equally freaked out and got the other maid who also freaked out so we were all squealing like '50's house wives and someone got the security guy who looked at us like we were all nuts...

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    2. opps, so I'll allow your dad his dash to the pool...

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  15. ok now you have me freaked out if we get to the water parks this year - will be picturing snakes on the slide lol

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  16. Oh that is bloody scary, but you made me have a good chuckle, so all in all the concept for the sequel is great. Shame for the people who are living with the real fear. Maybe they will be the ones to take on your challenge.

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  17. This absolutely sounds like it would make a great movie, I think you're on to something and I hope it makes you lots of money!

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