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Sunday, 9 March 2014

The actor I'd like to play me in the movie of my life

If they made a movie of my life, I'd want this guy to play me.

                            (image source: Gage Skidmore, Wikipedia Commons)

What I hear you say? You're a little old lady and he's a gun toting action hero. Well, they're the genre I like to see, so I'd have to add a few action scenes where I blow sh#t up and save the world to the story of my life.

If they made a movie of my life, I'd need a bit of embellishment. There's nothing wrong with my life, in fact, I have a great life. But there is a certain level of mundane day to day living that just wouldn't make for the big screen - in fact, it's certainly not the kind of movie I'd go and watch. It would be like a French Art House movie, filled with meaning (and meaningful stares) but nothing happens. And it makes you want to go and have a cigarette - even though you've never smoked, ever.

In fact, I think what I'd prefer to do, is make my life into a movie - where I storm the embassy, shoot the baddies and say funny one-liners under pressure. With a happy ending. I think my love for action movies is that they always have a happy ending. These days anyway. A movie of my life would involve sitting at swimming lessons, peeling potatoes and going to movies. A lot. Nothing wrong with that, but not entertaining viewing.

So thank yourselves that should Paramount Pictures approach me tomorrow, I have no problem gilding the lily to make a better story. I've been watching Hollywood do it for years, so I'm an expert.

Now if I was technologically savvy, at this point I'd insert a hilarious poster of said movie of my life - but I can't, so just dream up a Die Hard style poster with Bruce as me, saying yippee kai yay, mother f#ckers!

Linking up with I must confess.

8 comments:

  1. Ha ha, I'd love to see that poster and film! Hope you get that call from Paramount Pictures!

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  2. Why not?! I didn't let a little thing like a dead actor get in the way of the casting for my movie, so you can totally have a male playing you!!!

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  3. I can just imagine some great one liners coming out of his/your mouth!!! Yes I'm a sucker for a happy ending also x

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  4. Would he have a female voice? That would be hilarious!

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  5. Haha.... I love the Die Hard movies!! I gave up watching romantic comedies for 12 months out of protest that it never ends like that in real life (well my real life anyway).. Instead it ends in heartbreak and crying into a block of chocolate..... But no one wants to see that! Lol...

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  6. I would love to be staring in a movie alongside Bruce I know that much. Oh how I love him. So much.

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  7. I'd LOVE to see this movie Lydia! We just caught up with Red 2 and I love Bruce's character in that movie - a bit softer, yet sardonic and unbelievably tough. BTW we have a Die Hard bottle opener that yells Yippee Kai Yay whenever you open one - love it!!!

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    1. I have bottle opener envy - who knew that was a thing??

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