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Monday, 20 April 2015

This is how it goes.

Before I went away, I went to see Jeffrey Tambor in what was disappointingly a big ad that we paid to endure, so I won't talk more about that (note to organisers, if you are going to do that, make it free).

However, he mentioned that once he was really ill on stage, and that in order to get through the show, he had to let something go. The thing that he let go of, was the feeling of "do they like me?". He just didn't have the energy to worry about that. He got to see the footage of the performance later, and remarked that while he had expected it to be terrible, he was really, really good in it. He elaborated that the great actors don't worry about that. They turn up and exude "This is it. This is how it goes. Join up, or not."

In life, we do the same. We often spoil our own experiences by worrying too much about how what we say and do is perceived. We worry about how we look to others.

The challenge for today is to see if you can drop that. Turn up at work or the school gates, and say "This is it. This is how it goes." See whether people do indeed join up regardless.

More importantly, see if you notice a better personal experience.

Linking up for #MummyMondays

15 comments:

  1. People can take me as I am. I'm not going to present a false face just for them to find out later that I'm not like that at all. What you see is what you get people.

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  2. I used to care so much what people thought of me but honestly, I care less and less these days! Good to see you back :)

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  3. I find as I get older I just don't have the time and energy to worry like I use to but I come from generations of worriers, so I'm very much a work in progress.

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  4. This is like an omen for me today ... I have a 2nd job interview this arvo... I am just going to let it go.. If they like me great.. If I don't fit into what they want... Let it go

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  5. No point worrying about the things you can't change, and you are right, if you let it go and just be, you can just 'BE' totally yourself...and a much more chilled version too.

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  6. I'm getting there in some things. I stress less about what I wear these days and peoples thoughts; I would rather just be me.
    But I think there has to be a balance. Go too far with 'this is it' and you offend people pointlessly. You can be yourself whilst being others aware. It's tricky, but for me that's the goal.

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  7. I find what I worry about changes as my life changes. I used to worry about what people thought of my clothes, my appearance, etc, now I worry about what people think of my parenting choices, or what they think of my blog. I'm not going to change anything because of other people - this is still 'it' - but I can't help but care a bit about what other people think.

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  8. I'm with Mystery: the older I get the more comfortable I am in my own skin and with whatever I do. Even if I make an idiot of myself, it's okay, coz at least I tried!


    Visiting today from #teamIBOT x

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  9. Gosh I love this, thanks Lydia, it's what I needed to read today. Welcome back, I can't wait to hear snippets of your break away over the next few weeks/months.

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  10. Oh I really wish I was better at this. I spend way too much time worrying what people think of me and apologise continually to people too when I don't need to. Lovely to have you back!

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  11. Easy to say, hard to do in the moment but a necessary reminder all the same. I prefer people to like me for when I do or unintentionally say the wrong thing.

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  12. I have always cared what people think of me, and prioritised that over what I thought. As I get older though, I am finding it less important than it used to be.

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  13. I absolutely love that - do they like me - gone not important anymore. A very powerful attitude we all could use more of. Perhaps we need to ask ourselves however, do I like me?

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  14. Love this. I was talking about this in regards to my writing with my psych last week. I often feel my writing is going shitty and I feel like it's disjointed so I hit publish without rereading it. I then read it again the next day and more often than not I'm surprised at how it sounds, not at all the way it sounded in my head the night before.

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  15. Sometimes it is hard to let other people think what they want, but it's also empowering. Thanks for posting. Hello from Weekly Wrap Up.

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