Jodi Gibson wrote a post questioning how much we are shaped by our past? I would argue a lot, be that us avoiding being our parents, repeating past mistakes, or being the person we want to be, that we weren't before or wasn't modelled for us.
It doesn't have to be big, traumatic moments that shape us. All moments shape us, and how we think. All things, big and small shape us, so we really can't judge what an effect they have on us, as even the tiniest thing makes us act differently 'next time'. It's not good or bad. To put it in the most simplistic terms, I buy the books and board games for my kids that I loved as a kid but we didn't own - I seem to love those ones more than the ones I had. I don't know why I do this, but the pattern is there. Like it or not, we are the sum of a million tiny moments and we build on that with every minute of every day. We can work to avoid reacting one way, or the past can cause us to react a certain way but the end result is still the same. We are shaped by our experience, even if it is to make sure our experience doesn't shape us.
The good news is we can change. It is easy for us to change. At any point in time, we can take a different path. It's not the huge hurdle we think it is, we just need to add that moment of decision into the pile that shapes us.
You can turn over a new leaf at any moment, create a new beginning just with a thought or tiny action. It will slink by unheralded, but in time you will look back and see the change.
If you fail, decide again, and again if need be. It's as simple as that. Intellectually we scare ourselves away from change, as it seems so big. Yet it is just another one of those moments that pile up and shape us over time...As Winston Churchill said "To improve is to change, to be perfect is to change often."
Linking up for
Sooo much growth comes from change. Personally, I love it! It helps us evolve. But sometimes it just gets downright exhausting.
ReplyDeleteI found this great link this week to Richard Branson's favourite quotes about change.
http://www.virgin.com/richard-branson/my-top-10-quotes-on-change
Happy Friday!
Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit
I love change- I work with a lot of people who are highly resistant to it- puzzling. I think it keeps you young.
ReplyDeleteChange while difficult, is a good thing, a great thing even. I am preparing for a career change so am throwing myself in the deep end
ReplyDeleteI encourage change for my kids cause too many adults struggle with it. I embrace it ( even if secretly I am dying inside) because I want my children to accept it as part of normal life.
ReplyDeleteI like change. But self improvement is challenging. A lovely read today.
ReplyDeleteI used to hate change in the workplace but since I've been a stay at home mum for a long time I've learnt that change is good for the soul. Hence my new business venture. :)
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking a bit like this lately. Specifically in terms of, 'if I had done that like I wanted to, this wouldn't have happened." But then what would have? Or the other version, 'If I had done that, then I would already be where I wanted to be.' But would you? Or is the reason you're going that way because of all the lesson's you learn because you didn't do the first thing?
ReplyDeleteDoes that make any sense at all?
So true. People say you can't change, but you can - just need motivation and to put your mind to it. I totally agree your past shapes you, but you shape your future.
ReplyDeleteI am a stick in the mud as far as changes around me go but in the end I begrudgingly embrace them. I have to if I want to keep my job. The trouble is some changes just seem so pointless. As far as me changing... I like to think I've re-invented myself many times in my life. This is just my latest incarnation :)
ReplyDeleteI'm usually pretty open to change. It can be scary but usually is for the best. If we aren't learning from our past, and it's not changing us, we're not doing it right (in my opinion anyway!). x Aroha
ReplyDeleteLove that Winston Churchill quote. I think you know I agree that all of life is change and I'm working, constantly, on my reinvention.
ReplyDeleteWhilst I'm often striving to change, to be better etc I don't find it an easy process, it's all too easy to fall back into habits.
ReplyDeleteVisiting from rewind:)
I thrive on change. The one that freaked me out the most though, was when I found out I was going to have twins. Prior to that, nothing phased me. Breaking habits is so very hard but it's a misconception to think we can break it by a certain timeframe. It's unrealistic. But if we're persistent then we're heading in the right direction.
ReplyDeleteReminds me of another quote
ReplyDelete“Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”
― Mahatma Gandhi
A favourite of mine too :)
DeleteLovely post Lydia.
ReplyDeleteI love change! Some changes are easier than others though. A move to a new house is an exciting change. Stressful process but exciting!! Changing eating habits is HARD. Sometimes efforts to change take time - a long time! For example, I gave up smoking back in October 2009. I then became addicted to the Nicobate lozenges that helped me give up smoking. So though I took the plunge for change - I still was in a pickle. Not as bad as the original pickle but still a pickle. It wasn't until the lozenges that I was addicted to were recalled from shelves in 2014 (I still don't know why) that I had no choice but to go off them cold turkey. FINALLY - all these years later I am free from addiction to Nicotine! So yep - change is good but sometimes it is easier than other times :-)
ReplyDeleteI cant say I am a great fan of change - but it helps me to become more flexible and more resilient and that cant be a bad thing at all xx
ReplyDeleteIt's only after I've made a change that I realised that it's not such a bad thing after all. Thinking about doing it is the hard thing, thinking about what ifs. If I listened to myself all of the time, I wouldn't get anything done!
ReplyDeleteI love your last two pars. Often change can feel so daunting yet when you step away and reassess down the track, it wasn't that scary after all. It was necessary in shaping us and moving us forward. It can be hard to take that big leap, but it can be so worth it.
ReplyDeleteI really can relate to this post and your sentiments on change. The more we fear it, the more we avoid it, the more we even think that we can control it - the more change settles in nice and comfy into our lives. Change is not only inevitable, change happens in the smallest of ways every moment of our day. I especially love this "we are the sum of a million tiny moments" I wouldn't trade out those moments for stability or lack of change any day. Thank you for a great prompt and always linking up to #convocoffee Josefa
ReplyDeleteSo very true. Sum of a millin moments. I like Churchill's quote. I'm forever changing things, to improve them (around the house this drives my family insane!)
ReplyDeleteGosh this is so spot on. I've made many changes in my life - for the better, healthier, more positive. Not all of them have been huge, but all have been significant. You've just got to be brave and leap.
ReplyDeleteI love your views on change.
ReplyDeleteThe only thing constant is change...visiting from #MLSTL
ReplyDeleteYou have packed in many big gems in a very concise post. I especially like, "we are the sum of a million tiny moments" and "at any point in time, we can take a different path -- it's not the huge hurdle we think it is." You have given us all much to think about! #MLSTL
ReplyDeleteGreat post with some significant gems :) Change is growth, and it's when we're feeling uncomfortable that we grow. Like pearls in an oyster shell, they need a grain of sand. #MLSTL and Shared on SM
ReplyDeleteCheers for the share
DeleteI always find change to be pretty scary in the lead up, then I get brave and take the leap, then wonder why I left it so long because I could have been enjoying the phase for more time! I think I'm improving with age though!
ReplyDeleteThanks for linking up with us at MLSTL and I've shared on my SM :)
I was known for years to be against change, because I like stability and would do all the worst-case scenarios about new things. But I have learned to embrace it more, which is good, because life continues to put lots of opportunities to change in my path! Some of my change is coming in fact from understanding some of the "shape" that came from my childhood and teen years experiences...and actively choosing to change long held beliefs and habits. Thanks for sharing at #MLSTL
ReplyDeleteA great post for #mlstl as it's all about change as we move through the ages. I enjoyed reading your thoughts
ReplyDeleteWe can find change very challenging, it’s very common for families with autistic members. Thinking about it before hand and being prepared for it can make it much easier! #kcacols
ReplyDeleteAn interesting post, I agree that change can be a good thing and is very much a necessary thing. I personally find change very difficult, more so if it's imposed on me and not something I choose. I tend to see change as something I can't control.
ReplyDeleteKatrina x
#KCACOLS
I love change as long as I'm in charge of it! #kcacols
ReplyDeleteI'm not always someone who likes to embrace change, it can be quite a big thing for me. But once I do embrace I often ask myself why I didn't embrace it sooner. Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next time
ReplyDeleteI not one for embracing change. I thrive in familiar. That doesn't mean I don't change or adapt to change I'm just not as initially open to it as maybe I should be #KCACOLS
ReplyDelete