Managing milestones

I've had a number of milestones lately - a child become an adult and finish school, a 20th wedding anniversary (where did that go?) and a HUGE milestone birthday. Rather than be sad at any of these events, I've celebrated excitedly. Though I have noticed with some friends, they've gone the other way, lamenting what they've lost.

I've had a few mother friends struggle with the end of school emotions, whereas I just saw it as an exciting new beginning. A few male friends become depressed at the idea of turning 50, where as mine was a huge party where I could thank all my 'village' for all that they'd done to get me through the hard times. 'The great thing about getting older is that you get a chance to tell the people in your life who matter what they mean to you. ' Mike Love

I think a lot of these feelings are to do with where you are at in life. My forties were filled with roughly six years of difficult and overwhelming problems. There was little respite, as year after year some new issue arose. I am now feeling clear of most of those, so I guess I am in a 'good place' comparatively and 50 is to be celebrated. However, if I was stuck in that swamp still, I would maybe see it as a bad thing, adding to my other problems.

I am old, there is no denying that. For me however, it's not a new idea - I've seen it in the mirror for years now, and reflected back at me at concerts where I clearly don't 'fit in'. I'm much more comfortable about 'owning' that than I used to be.

One of the cards that made me smile, was this from a faraway friend, as it felt at times I'd sunk permanently into the mire, yet obviously I hadn't :

And she was right. I had a wonderful party and loved the effort everyone made to dress up and dazzle. I followed it up with a wonderful weekend of all the things I loved with the people I loved most. And when I woke up on the Monday morning, I thought to myself 'If this is 50, it's pretty damn good!'

The upside of 50, as another friend wrote:

And better yet, make your friends join in! We are all in this together, one way or another, and a rising tide lifts all boats. We can't be up and happy all the time, but when we are, try to make it contagious!

Linking with #LifeThisWeek.