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Monday, 13 June 2016

Pushing through concrete (Part 2)

I've been dealing with some issues for the last two years and as discussed here in Part 1, I suddenly ran out of fuel. I just lost my ability to reset and move on. My usual escapes weren't working, and I was losing the ability to manage it all.

My resilience had eroded completely. I literally had no energy left to deal with anything, especially myself.

Then I saw a meme on Instagram that said 'You can't pour from an empty cup. Take care of yourself first' and I instantly recognised the truth in those words. I'd been giving so many pieces of me away in support of others, and what needed to be done, that I'd slowly dissolved my own levels of everything.

So I started running up the firestairs and yesterday while I was doing so, I remembered the fabulous Always Josefa had written an eloquent post called Pushing through Concrete. I couldn't remember what she'd said, but I remember I had given her a pep talk and she'd liked it. I decided I probably needed to hear her advice and my own chastising response.

I sought out the post, read it, read my response. It helped. It worked almost immediately. I had 'reset' again. Just like that. I needed her words, and mine, to reframe all my troubles and my role in them. 'Past me' travelled through time to tell 'current me' to see the situation clearer.

The lessons:

1. Bloggers, when you share those difficult posts, you help people. I know the risks are great for you, but know that if you help just one person, it is most definitely worthwhile.

2. One of the upsides of blogging, and comments, is that you meet people that help you in ways you may not even understand at the time.

3. Be as kind to yourself as you are to others - sometimes you can't even see it until you read words you said to someone else when they were in a position you find yourself in now.

4. If you are pushing through concrete, know that you aren't alone, and it will pass.

I left a comment for AJ to let her know I'd revisited the post and it had helped me, and to my surprise, she then wrote this on her FB page. "This beautiful comment felt like the pop-up cheer squad I didn't even know I needed! Thank you Lydia, one day we will meet and I will tell you how important this post is. For the rest of us, keep your face to the light, fear and doubt will claw at you, but you must keep moving forward - one step at a time, even when and especially when it feels like you are pushing through concrete " Words and support come from unexpected places. (We are now in a thank you loop but that's another story!)
💛

 All you need is enough of the happy little pleasures to be able to recharge and take on the bigger things. Especially when it feels like you are pushing through concrete.

I wrote this post on Self Care tips in Feb so rather than repeat it, I thought I'd link this old post for #Lifethisweek.

27 comments:

  1. Needed THIS post today as number 1 applies to me. My gut is in knots waiting for my first comment on today's vulnerable post. It is always scary putting things out there but I do remind myself that helping even one person is important xxxx

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  2. She's an inspiration that AJ and so are you!!! It can be so hard to get through the day some times. When we feel like that it's so important to take time out to look after ourselves and turn to our cheer squad. Take care x

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  3. This is so true. I loved that post by Josefa. I've been feeling a bit like this lately too, so being reminded of those words when I the post about this was exactly what I needed x

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  4. We can all get by with a little help from our friends, especially the ones of the blogging variety. So pleased you're feeling better x

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  5. This is true connection and what we all need. Thanks for sharing it. I had a piece published on kidspot today about my anxiety and sharing it was really hard- but if it helps just one person- worth it.

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  6. This is why I love blogging. Beautiful. xx

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  7. Yes, yessy, yes! Those pop up cheer squads really do fuel us along don't they? I have been so grateful many times. I hope that you are able to take some of your own advice and reboot x

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  8. I think that's the wonder of blogging - you never know who will be reading what you write or when. It's great you were able to draw strength and inspiration from an old post - and I hope you do get the time to relax, reset and come back stronger :)

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  9. What a beautiful post Lydia. Firstly, I hope things are feeling better, sometimes pushing through concrete has a way of bringing us down just when we feel like we have lifted our heads up. Everyone is going through something in their life, we often forget that when we feel most alone and isolated in our own troubles. It doesn't take our troubles away to know others have theirs too, but sometimes it makes the burden a little lighter. #convocoffee is back! I didn't know what it would take when Is topped posting my #convocoffee posts - but I am so grateful that this is the exchange, this is the moment that did bring it back xx

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  10. I've spent the last week feeling like my concrete blocks have turned to quicksand.

    I'm doing the minimum with blogging at the moment because I don't want to continue to share how bad my health is. Health issues are once again consuming me, making it hard to blog about anything else.

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  11. This is one of the best parts of blogging- the opportunity to reflect and learn. Good on you for pushing through xx

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  12. I love this part of blogging. You never know how important your words could be to someone. And I do hope you continue to look after yourself Lydia - it's a long-term battle but I hope you do get on top of it again x

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  13. Ohhhhhh I can relate to pushing through concrete. I really hope you can get some relief soon. xo

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  14. Such valuable lessons too. Sharing yourself is good because there is always someone out there reading that is feeling the same way and will be helped from your words.

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  15. Thank you for the sharing and honesty. My blogging connections are very special to me and I am so glad I have 'met' people here and in real life thanks to blogging.

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  16. The blogging community is a positive and supportive one. I have learnt and grown so much since being in it, its all good. I am feeling like I have concrete shoulders lately, I know it will pass and better days will come my way :)

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  17. You're so right here. We never know when our story strikes a chord with someone we haven't even met and how helpful it can be. And that's the best ever thing about blogging - these connections we make.

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  18. This just speaks such truth to me! Two years ago I didn't know how I would ever push through that concrete I wish I had seen this then, but still it is a constant reminder that we really are not alone and sharing our stories can inspire and help others. #mg

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  19. Hugs Lydia! So glad you connected. I've learned that making a difference even in one life is completely worth it. What power words have! Sending you love! And here thanks to #mg. :)

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  20. Support comes from all sorts of places. I was having a tough time with my writing a couple of months ago and then a message from a fellow author who I respected very much who'd read Happy Ever After popped into my inbox. It didn't just make my day it helped top up my faith in myself.

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  21. Hope you've got the support you need to overcome the challenges, and get your energy back.#lifethisweek

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  22. I feel a bit like that since leaving my toxic job. It's like it sucked the marrow out of me and has made me not trust what other employers might be offering. Each time I think about whether to work or not I feel my gut start to clench. So for now I'm going to keep being kind to myself and wait and not rush - I hope you do the same xx

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  23. Lydia, I can relate to how blogging difficult experiences can benefit not only yourself in being able to 'let it all out' in a safe space but can also help those who read in reassuring them that they are not alone.

    Take care

    SSG xxx

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  24. Lydia this was a lovely read and I especially like your tips to bloggers. It is sometimes hard to be honest, knowing there is the potential for many others to read your words but it can also help the writer in us too, to just get it out there. I'm always surprised that so many take the time to comment on particularly personal posts and often agree they have felt the same way about the issue at hand. Also being kind to ourselves is very important, that phrase pushing through concrete is so spot on! Thanks so much for your fabulous post #lifethisweek

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  25. THIS is why I blog. To share our stories and to connect. Thanks Lydia for re-posting. Always a great reminder of how good it can be to blog!

    Thank you for linking up for #lifethisweek and next week's optional prompt is 22/51 First Job. 3/6/19 Warm wishes, Denyse

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