Sunday 8 October 2017

Regret, it piles up around us like books we haven't read

While in Singapore, we went to the Children's Biennale at the National Gallery. As we went floor by floor to the installations, my map reading ability and lack of familiarity of the building's layout was challenged. In my defence the gallery spans across two buildings, but I am also a little deficient in this area.  At one point we stop to ask a guide where the work was and she pointed us in the other direction. As we cross the gallery, I realise she has to be wrong, so we return, this time asking 'kid's biennale?' and pointing past her. She then nods in surprise, bemused that we were wanting to see it, and points around the corner from where she is standing. In Singapore, apparently, adult tourists without kids with them would not be interested in the whimsical art works of the Children's Biennale.

The work in question was Lynn Lu's Duplet. You sit under the cloud and answer questions. The first question was 'What do you most want to do in life?'
The second question was 'Why haven't you done it?'

At which point we fled, not to be made to feel bad in our inadequacy by an artwork.


The simplicity of it is confronting. You have a dream, you just need to do it. That is basically all that holds you back. Your lack of action. The question strips you of your excuses, because it's quite hard to listen to your excuses out loud.

Ironically, the experience with the guard highlights that on occasion, other people's expectation of you holds you back. We clearly wanted to behave like children in the eyes of the guard, but we did it anyway. We could have easily skipped that work out of embarrassment. However I learnt long ago not to miss out for fear of looking foolish. 

So to avoid regret, I ask you:

What do you most want to do in life and why haven't you done it?

(Linking with #Lifethisweek because even though I make a lot of mistakes and say dumb things, I tend less to ask myself 'Why did I?' and the more common question is 'Why didn't I?'. For me it's what I didn't do that looms bigger in my thought space.  The link at the start of the post has more pictures of the other delightful installations. It was a really fun exhibition).




33 comments:

  1. Wow. That's good! So much to think about in that piece of art work. And it works so well with the "regrets" prompt! Love it. xo

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  2. Oh, that's a really powerful image - simple question, complex answer. Just fabulous.

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  3. See, I have never really figured out what I want to do. I will have to think about that question - but not too much!

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  4. Definitely a powerful follow up question. It's hard for me to not answer it with excuses.

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  5. I have no idea and I don't think I ever have. I wonder how kids tackle such big questions!

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  6. I most want to write. I think I've failed cos I've not written a book. Perhaps I'm not meant to write a book. Just my blogging and stuff. Still.....

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    1. Perhaps you and I need to get on each other's cases. I constantly complain that everyone I know has a book deal but the fact is I never actually sit down to write beyond a short story....ha!

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  7. Yes you're so right! And using your analogy, I think just as we can then read those books, we can also then address (if not fix) our regrets. I regret not having traveled more, but I plan to rectify that!

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  8. I want to be both brave and honest to myself.

    That art installation is so thought provoking too.

    SSG xxx

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  9. That is such a great yet provocative installation. What an interesting experience. You have many of these and I often think that you are helping many of see what we may not! Thank you for linking up for #lifethisweek 39/52. Next week: Letter to My 20 year old Self.

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  10. Well that was thought provoking and maybe a little confronting...I think I might have to get moving on making those dreams come true!

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  11. very thought provoking. I do believe everything happens for a reason, but if there is something you want to do in life you have to go out there and get it, work towards your goals it is so rewarding when we achieve something. #twinklytuesday

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  12. I remember being at a business conference and being told every entrepreneur is a dreamer who acts on their dreams. Regret is a strange one and quite often in our power do avoid it if we dare and are prepared to take a risk and and take failure along the way too. #TwinklyTuesday

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  13. Oh my that is a confronting question. If only you come out from under the clouds, the sky is the limit! I really just need to work out the steps and just start doing things I have put off for so long.

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  14. What an amazing experience #fortheloveofblog@_karendennis

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  15. That is a massive question! I think with different stages of life come different wants and do right now I am doing what I wanted to. Which was give up work to stay home with the boys and carve a career around the blog. In the future, who knows! Thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday

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  16. Do you know what, I have kind of given up thinking about the things that I want to do in favour of being the kind of person that I want to be. Actually, I am now the kind of person that I want to be and that is quite a nice feeling. I don't want to be complacent, but at the moment, things feel okay. Pen x #TwinklyTuesday

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  17. I've achieved quite a lot of things I wanted to do, but also still have a bit of a bucket list. Like thesingleswan, I've been focusing on being the kind of person I'd always wanted to be. #noregrets #TeamLovinLife

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  18. Very confronting! I'm reasonably happy with my life and my achievements. I guess if I had my time over again I would have made education more of a priority. #TeamLovinLife

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  19. Wow - that is very confronting - but soooo good!! I really like it! I need to really think about what I really want to do most in life. I don't have an instant answer for that. I think I'm still trying to work it out. I'd better get a move on! #TeamLovinLife

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  20. Such a poignant question! I'm a firm believer in just getting stuff done. That's why I set myself achievable goals each year and make sure I do them. Whether that's spending more time on 'me' or learning a new skill. Thanks for linking up to #fortheloveofBLOG

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  21. Thought provoking! I want to change so many things in life so that my disabled son no longer has to face indignity and exclusion. This year I have taken the bull by the horns and started legal action! I may not succeed, but I will give my all. #KCACOLS

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  22. I agree with this...to a point. Sometimes the answer is that other things became more important, sacrifices that would have been needed unwilling to be made. Its something worth thinking about, but not feeling bad about I think #kcacols

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  23. what an amazing piece of art. something that actually inspires conversation and thinking. really fab. thanks for joining #KCACOLS, come back next time!

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  24. I love the art. Sometimes I think I am my worst enemy when it comes to doing what I want. #kcacols

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  25. Those are great questions to ask yourself to keep on track with your core values. The overwhelming response to the second question would be because of the pandemic! A lot of us are prevented from following our hearts because of it.

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  26. I recall reading this when you originally posted it and am still blown away by the simple power of those 2 questions.

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    1. It's so weird how simple yet shocking they are. Not shocking, arresting maybe.

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  27. Okay ouch! Those are such simple questions and yet, so fricking poignant. Need to think about this and potentially use it in therapy with clients too!

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  28. What a great take on the prompt Lydia! A great question and what a great visual way of asking it, love it. #lifethisweek

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  29. and here I am (again) reading my comments and adding more....Why Didn't I?...good one.

    Thank you for linking up for #lifethisweek. #202. (I know!) Next week's optional prompt is 33/51 I Want. 17.8.2020 and I hope that you link up then too. Take care, Denyse.

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