Little Loves - August

This may be the last official Little Loves, so I'd like to thank Rachel Swirl for the format - I will keep doing it as I find it a shorter version of Taking Stock, which I find a little too long.

READ I saw this post on the Jindo Path and became obsessed with understanding the science behind it - how only twice a year if it's related to lunar cycles? 

I am also re reading Fahrenheit 451. It's such a great book. Opens with a description of a fire that is both the fire burning but also the fire inside the man, that eagerness that lights up fuelled with power and hate - and you see both clearly. Extraordinary writing. It also has the most beautiful description of effects of depression, without ever mentioning it. It's the paragraph that surrounds this line  "Two moonstones looked up at him in the light of his small hand-held fire; two pale moonstones buried in a creek of clear water over which the life of the world ran, not touching them." I am savouring the rereading of it, not for the story but the beautiful imagery. If you haven't read it, the story is engrossing and a terrifying look at our current life, where we feel connected with strangers on the internet but disconnected from those at the dinner table. Astounding that is was written in1953! If you don't have a copy, you can also listen to it through your library on Hoopla. (Read it, and listen to. There's so much in it to savour!) 

WATCHED I went to see three short Tennessee Williams plays, one of which had the line "the past keeps getting bigger and bigger at the expense of the future" which has been haunting me ever since. 

We also went to the kooky When Night Comes as the start of our Sydney Fringe Festival. There is an easily recognised Shakespeare speech but at another part, there is a speech that ends with "behind me I heard the tapping of a blind man's cane" and it's driving me nuts as I can't place it. I initially thought Poe but I can't think which one. So maybe Frankenstein or The Invisible Man (H. G. Wells not Ralph Ellison). If anyone knows, let me know.

On tv I'm watching Vice Principals (which is a cringe fest) but really nothing worth noting seems to be on at the moment.

HEARD I couldn't get tickets to Alex Warren so I've been playing him on repeat at the moment, making myself jealous of all those lucky ducks that got to go to what I'm sure would have been a fabulous concert.

 

I did get tickets to Chane Pena so I'm beginning to play him so that my husband wants to come too, as I know he'll like him. This is not his best song but it's filmed in Iceland and I want to go there so it's a visual treat for me!

WORE Sydney's endless rain is doing my head in. So cocktail dress with rain boots is the go!

AND LASTLY I love looking at the month to pick my three favourite things. It's hard to narrow it down! And that is a blessing. Listening to the fun my kiddo had at their birthday party - singing, dancing & laughter - all round good vibes. Sheng Wang was very funny and I keep getting a bit in my head every time I see berries at the supermarket, which makes me chuckle out loud, resulting in strange looks, which makes me laugh more. After a short music drought, I've seen gigs every Friday night so that always makes me happy. The high lights for elating fun with friends, has got to be the line dancing, the singalong and many meals out with friends. It's been a month of lovely catch ups! I am also beside myself with excitement at how my ice plant is progressing. I can't wait until I can eat it!

As always, my Insta is here and linking with #LittleLoves and #WeekendCoffeeShare

Share Four Somethings - August

The Sydney Marathon is soon upon us, and as it's now the Seventh Star, all the international runners are descending upon us. We are putting a number of them up, and entertaining a large group of them and locals who all know each other. So a very busy weekend approaches at the end of the month.

Something I loved Been to a few great plays, lots of great meals out with friends and many all around good times. I went to the Musical Singalong at Grand Electric  and was amazed and what an elating afternoon it was. I don't sing in key but it was such a good vibe that I wasn't embarrassed and didn't care. It was fun and plenty of hilarity as well as that rousing emotion that songs tap into (looking at you Les Miserables). If it's on again, I'll definitely be back. You got to vote for the top 10, and most people had a few of their favourites in there. There was plenty of dancing, even from the 80 year olds celebrating a birthday and special applause to the people that enacted Ex-Wives from Six. There's been so much to love this month, it's a little hard to narrow it down. (My Insta clips are here).

Something I learned I have learnt about the Jindo Sea Path. I don't understand how it can only happen twice a year, if it's sort of tidal. A path of seabed is revealed and you can walk a few kilometres between the islands for an hour. It is a literal parting of the sea, caused by tide harmonics (I will admit I'm still searching for an explanation on that which I properly understand), the lunar gravitational pull, the rotation of the earth and the funnelling effect of the Myeongnyang Strait. I find the science behind this fascinating. It's not so much that it can happen, but only twice a year. I think it should be more frequent if the Lunar cycle is involved but science is not my strong point alas! So much to learn! The world is an AMAZING place. Instagram pictures a plenty here.

Something that went well My elderly mum had cancer and had a major surgery. She has recovered AMAZINGLY well for someone close to 90 and is back on her feet and finally at home. I marvel at both the human body and the medical expertise that can make this happen. They got all the cancer and it hadn't spread and they have decided no further treatment is required. She wasn't going to do radio or chemo anyway so I am glad she can just follow doctors orders.

Something I let go of  I wrote back in May that I had to let go of some friends. I did limp along making up my people pleasing excuses for them for about 12 months but I've now removed myself from the group chat and will just see those that want to see me on a smaller scale. I am at peace with it, except that perhaps I'm a little embarrassed that I should have done it about 10 years ago. I am happy to see them, but only if they instigate it. Since I started easing away, 18 months ago, I've really only seen the same few people who I still see now so it really won't make any difference to me, except a positive mental health one. In the Do you F***ing Mind podcast that I listened to yesterday, she spoke of rejection and it really hit home. She asked 'What boundaries to I need to put in place so I don't need to have to deal with that again?...What do I have to do so I don't find myself in that situation again?' The onus on taking control of the situation for self preservation.

 She said (and I'm paraphrasing) 'People will reject you a thousand times before they have to reject you verbally. And we allow ourselves to be rejected again and again. If someone has shown, based on their actions that they are not interested in seeing you, they're not interested in reaching out to you, instigating, initiating - none of that, repeatedly, that is a rejection. You are being told repeatedly, 'I am not interested in this friendship' and you need to accept that." Her advice (which is always so great) is to put your energy elsewhere, into other friends and peacefully tap out. Which is what I've done. I'm not angry, I'm happy to see them but I'm not only seeing them if I organise it. 

I am putting certain boundaries in place so I'm not in that situation ever again, with anyone. It's been done quietly so they won't even notice, so there's no need for anger or drama. It's just time to move on. I am quite proud of myself that I'm now at peace with it, as I've spent years being annoyed about poor treatment but I never actually called them on it. It really is that simple. As a friend said "If they don't appreciate you, why do you even want to spend time with them? Just spend time with us." People treat you how you let them, and I've let it go on for far too long.

I don't feel mean and petty (as I wrote in May) but I am ashamed I never spoke out. If my daughter had friends that did this, I would tell her to get better friends. As an adult, I allowed them to treat me this way, and kept footing the bill for people that clearly we were irrelevant to. It's been obvious for years but I just kept repeating the pattern, and allowing them to repeat theirs. I am too old to have put up with this. I'm embarrassed that in May I wrote about it (truth be told as a way to force myself to do it; once it's out there, I'm accountable) and it still took me 3 months to actually do it. And this is to do something that won't actually change my day to day in any way. It's shamefully pathetic. How am I so old but with so little courage and self respect? Lots to focus on there. That is the bit I can't let go of, but I guess I am finally working on that.

The other thing I've had to let go of is my Ginger Koskenkorva. I finished it and I don't think you can get in Australia anymore. Boo! 

A long one this month, sorry about that. It has been a great month regardless of weather and closing chapters. 

Linking with #ShareFourSomethings

First of the Season

 And just like that, the cherry blossom is beginning to bloom!

Always a sign that Spring is here (or at least soon to be here).

Now if it would just stop raining so we could enjoy it, instead of hurrying past!

The Magnolias are out right now too! I find it interesting that I wait for the Cherry Blossom as the sign Winter is over and my husband waits for the Magnolias to flower....same, same but different! 

As I write this, I can hear him playing the song from Magnolia the movie. Ha!

(I am offline due to personal obligations for the next two days so will get to commenting on the weekend, if not before)

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Tell us about....Accident

Firstly, a trigger warning. If you have experienced loss due to a car accident, don't bother reading this. It's just a little poem and not worth any emotional distress it might cause.

I was really at a loss for what to talk about this month so this is all you get:

The sounds in that moment is all I can recall.

A high pitched screech of rubber failing to grip the tar.

Tinkling as glass implodes.

The clangoring of metal concertinaing into the wall.

The order often changes when I am forced to think of that shattering moment. 

Just an agonizing echo of the tumult

when I look where my leg used to be,

or at the passenger seat, now forever empty.

Linking with #TellUsAbout. #TalkaboutitTuesday

Another rain song

I know I'm harping on about the rain but it really is doing my head in. 

I guess the dams are filling (and endless problem in Sydney) and the gardens are green but the clothes aren't drying unless we use the dryer  (for the Americans, this is frowned upon here as lazy and kind of selfish due to the environmental damage and wastefulness, like cage eggs, we never want to admit we are doing it. We do love the smell of clothes dried in the sun!) and more importantly, it's ruining my ability to walk everywhere. I regularly squeeze in a 3-5km walk by getting to the theatre or show on foot.

However, I was lucky enough to get a dry window for my 11km walk this Sunday and got some fabulous pics as a reward.

Even got up close to a bush turkey who seemed to want to dry off for a bit!

And of course, the rainbow finished off the morning! A good reminder that we need a little rain to appreciate the rainbow!

 

 

Linking with #WeekendReflection #GaleriahImmelsblick #Skywatch #WordlessWednesday #WildbirdWednesday

  

I'm leaving you with Takashi Wakasugi's brilliant bit about the shame of having to buy cage eggs when all the other eggs are sold out. 

“Just when you feel you have no time to relax, know that this is the moment you most need to make time to relax.” ― Matt Haig

 I've been spending far too much time in the hospital carpark, visiting a relative daily. It's an hour away from me so the stress and the exhaustion was really beginning to hit. I sort of had a moment of mental collapse on Sunday while trying to order food at a pub. I didn't want to eat anything on the menu and I sort of became mentally paralysed. Guessing that's some sort of transference. Anyway, I snapped out of it but when I next hit the carpark, which is costing so much money*, I decided I may as well have a little fun.

To adapt a Mother Teresa quote inner 'peace begins with a smile' and it did make me smile.

I know many of you will find this odd, but taking these photos, playing around with the framing, really put a spring in my step. It was a quick way to shake off the mental load. And as Jane Austen said "One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other." 

Do you find joy is strange things?

The car park shots made me think of Jeffrey Smart, an artist whose work I love. So there's a little nod to him in the last three.

Linking with #WordlessWednesday #HappyNow #HappyTuesday #WWOT #TheRandom #SundayBest #SundaySnapshot #WeekendReflection #TrafficJamReboo #Keithsramblings

*I hate that hospital carparks are some of the most expensive in the country. It's bad enough you have to visit people with cancer or have cancer but then you need to drain your bank account with each visit. There's something morally offensive about that. I know that's probably how they had to pay for the carpark to be built but there should be a better way....