I was catching up with some friends, at one of the women's new home. We'd ooh-ed and ahhh-ed for a couple of hours, as it is a big sea-change for them and stunning house. About three house into the day, as we were sitting down to lunch, my other friend mentioned quietly she'd just bought a beach house. I was so excited for her, but my instant reaction was "How'd you sit on that piece of news for so long?!" I had assumed it was because she didn't want to steal the spotlight from our other friend.
By coincidence we were also having lunch again the next day, and I laughed in disbelief at her for holding back on such exciting news. She responded "You just feel funny telling people, because you don't want to be lording it over them". (To which I replied, 'Not me! Lord away! I need the good news!')
I have a number of friends that no longer put up their travel photos on Facebook, because they receive such a negative reaction. The veiled criticism 'You're always away", "Where are you now?" or "Do you EVER work?"
My question is, when did we become so pissy? Why aren't we happy for our friends anymore? Why do you have to feel awkward when you have something great going on?
Basically, I'm at an age where friends are dying too young, battling cancer, getting divorced, losing their house, losing their jobs and a myriad of other crap news that you are helpless to do anything to change for them. I am more than happy to be the shoulder to cry on in these cases, but for me personally, I'm needing some good news. I want to hear your happiness. I want the holiday snaps of sunnier shores, to celebrate your good fortune, your beach house, your fabulous new life! I need to see that something is working out for someone, somewhere.
I will always be more than happy to listen to the bad, but I want to be able to celebrate heartily the good news when I can. It seems so infrequent these days.
So please don't hold back on your good fortune, sing it loud and celebrate it. Some of us are desperate to celebrate with you. And for those that aren't, let them go!
“There is no bad time for good news.” - Stephen King
Linking up for #MummyMondays
Gosh how sad that people can't even post their pictures- jealousy's a real curse!
ReplyDeleteYes, people find it difficult to express positivity for each other. I have a facebook friend that must see the posts I comment on or like, and she immediately jumps on board and shares her 'opinion', which is always very negative and often very mean. I feel like this swell of negativity is going to be detrimental to us collectively.
ReplyDeleteSo true, people judge and have such strong opinions. It's funny on FB I tend to not post too much on my personal account, only if it is something worthwhile like a holiday snap or getting dressed up to go to a wedding. My life probably looks exciting to others, but really these posts have months in between. I guess it is ho people interpret it isnt it?!
ReplyDeleteI totally agree! I love hearing good news!
ReplyDeleteI'm 100% with you on this, I love to hear other people's happy news. Happiness is totally contagious and I want to know when my friends are happy. I don't have time for negative people. #TeamIBOT
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ReplyDeleteI love the Stephen King quote. And agree with you whole-heartedly. With the state of the world at the moment, the media's fascination with it and society's hunger for it (sadly) we need ALL the good news we can get! Spill it I say!
ReplyDeleteI love this post :)
ReplyDeleteI'm with you. Share the love! Share the adventures! Share the happiness! Share the pride! Share it all.
I much prefer to read good news stories. They are steeped in hope and happiness.
I remember we had family visiting from the US and we certainly made the most of their time with us and we were always doing something exciting, and I had a friend comment on it. I have been wondering this same thing lately. And even if you ARE bitter and jealous, is it really that hard to fake it and make a NICE comment, or hey, better yet, don't comment at all?!?!?! I am incredibly jealous of people who get to buy nice things or go nice places, but I am actually happy for them at the same time, not spiteful about it. That just makes you even more miserable.
ReplyDeleteI love good news and even if I have a pang of jealousy the good news wins out. We need positivity in the world.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely! I would much rather share in someone's happiness than watch them moaning about trivial shit all the time. Share away I reckon. Joy begets joy.
ReplyDeleteI think social media brings out the worst in people and slowly that negativity is spilling over into real life interactions, hence the seclusion of our good news - or any news for the matter. The pendulum has swung to both extremes on this one - the dawn of social media: share everything, social media now: share with caution users beware ;) I love good news, tell me more xx
ReplyDeleteThis is something I probably need to work on. I would definitely share about a new house, or holiday, but I hold back with other things which is silly real. We all need more good news.
ReplyDeleteI love hearing good news but yes I tend to keep my good news under wraps.
ReplyDeleteI can understand this from both sides. When I first made my seachange I felt my good fortune was just too much and I felt guilty. Of course I'd worked for 20yrs before getting the redundancy and getting to move, plus I'd gotten a REDUNDANCY which mean no job.
ReplyDeleteBut I am also sometimes tempted to be that bitchy person who makes someone else feel bad cos they have stuff I don't. I know that sounds horrible but I think I tend to play the victim and enjoy the pity at times and want to make sure others know how pitiful my life really is. Recently I wrote about pity vs envy and was ashamed that I sometimes want people to pity me. But at the same time I said it was more about acknowledging my struggles than anything else. I think hearing someone (who has good news) say they know they're fortunate can make others feel better about what they don't have.
Sorry, that was long and blithery!
That's incredibly honest (and don't apologise for being 'long and blithery' - that's not the case at all!!!
DeleteHow sad that people feel they can't share their happiness with others. Share away I say!
ReplyDeleteI think if you feel you need to hold back on something for these reasons with friends you should really reevaluate your friendship.
ReplyDeleteI'm with you, I definitely want to hear all the good bits. I guess I'm a bit of a voyeur when it comes to travel too. I want to know everything!!
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