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Monday, 26 May 2014

If I could turn back time, if I could find a way...

Now that I've given you all a very nasty earworm, I'll move onto my journey if I could time travel...I would travel back, long, long ago to have a little chat to a man, and try to change the course of human history. That man would be Noah, and the conversation would go a little like this:

Me: Noah, we need to talk. You are about to make a huge mistake. I know you've been charged with a task, but you need to reconsider...maybe "accidently" just leave two creatures off - or even just one creature off really, the female head louse. It's only tiny, it will barely be noticed. And in many centuries to come, I won't spend a good part of my life coming the f%$#ers out, night after night, causing floods of tears that quite possibly will require me to build an ark of my own soon...

Noah [looking doubtful]: Errr...

Me: You know what will happen, if you let them on, they'll be in your hair, then your wife's, then the kids - and you haven't even got one of those fine-toothed, metal combs. You'll just have to itch for forty days and forty nights (or is that Moses?). Anywho, it won't be pretty, but it will be too late!

Noah [nodding pensively]: Hmmm.

Me: And one last thing, don't forget the Unicorns - and don't eat them!

I bet that earworm seems preferable now to the head scratching some of you will be doing at the mere mention of head lice...


Also, if you like time travel movies, and don't mind subtitles, I liked this one: 11 A.M. It's a very simple idea that they let play out. You should be able to get it at the video shop (or wherever you down load movies from if you are younger than my 107 years)

13 comments:

  1. While he is at it Noah could "accidentally on purpose" forget the thread worm.

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    1. Good thinking!! I wonder who carried those on board?

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  2. BRILLIANT! I wish he would have left behind cockroaches too! Thanks for the ear worm and the itching...*scratches head furiously*

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  3. Brilliant! Get rid of the bloody mozzies and snakes while you're at it and I'd be happy camper!

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    1. What? Snakes are awesome and cool - what on earth are you talking about???

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  4. All of the above. And spiders. I fracking hate spiders!

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  5. Fleas too please!! I spend a fortune on getting rid of those nasty little buggers that only ever seem to find me attractive. Luckily the cooler weather means we are flea free at the moment!! Isn't thatt a claim to fame. This house has been flea free for at 3 weeks!!

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  6. Yeah, Noah maybe should have thought it through a little more...

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  7. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  8. Ugh sorry about that last comment..no idea what that link was too!

    Anyway..yep he definitely needed to rethink some of the pests he brought along with him while leaving the unicorns behind!

    Thanks for linking up with us at The Lounge!

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  9. When nits walk into this house on the heads of my kids I will be cursing Noah too! :)

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  10. Yes! I am struggling to get rid of head lice at our house. I am wondering if it is appropriate just to accept them and learn to coexist.

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  11. OMG I have had this same conversation...Nits were the bane of our existence when the kids were little. I have had them myself and cursed the powers that created them. Bonding with the kids over nightly nit combing is not a treasured family memory here :)

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