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Monday, 1 August 2016

When the stars align

We have three kids, and this week, the eldest and the youngest will be at camp, with, by coincidence, one night crossing over. Leaving the middle child at home alone with us.

This is a rare, rare thing for the middle child. He usually has to fall in around the plans of others, rarely getting undivided attention. 

So we have declared this 'Night of Didier' (Not his name but if I'm making up names I may as well make up something exotic). We have spent weeks discussing the pending celebratory night, and what we should do with it. Sushi train and a movie (we can no longer go to sushi train as it bankrupts us if all five of us are dining), bowling and dinner somewhere special, something else entirely? The options are pretty limitless at this stage, and thus nothing has been decided as yet.

I have already turned down 2 invitations to events, as it is Night of Didier, and I must attend!

It's sweet how much he is looking forward to it, and that in itself is a reminder of what a dud deal the middle child gets at times. I keep thinking I must make sure this happens a little more often, so we get the freedom to talk that one on one time together offers. At the moment it's usually just once a week when I drive him to an after school activity, while the other two are already at their own activities. A brief fifteen minutes, once every seven days. 

He doesn't complain but I know he's so excited to have his own room for the night, and to have us to himself. He even asked if I could drive him to school in the morning, as I won't have to drop off our youngest to hers. He is perfectly happy getting the bus, and on occasion his dad will drive him and the eldest if it is raining, but he actually just wants the car trip with me. I was so touched when he asked. A teen now, but there's still hints of the young boy he was still in there. A reminder again that I must make more effort before he vanishes completely into the moody, independent teen that would rather arrive sodden than be seen in the car with his mum.

These moments are fleeting and yet so special. I will treasure it more than him, I suspect. So the planning continues until the night of celebration begins.

What would you do?
Do you have a regular one-on-one with each child? 
Does your middle child miss out?



Lnking with #FortheloveofBLOG and read what we did on the Night of Didi here

29 comments:

  1. I've only got two (step daughter all grown up and much older than the other two) so it's easy. We divide and conquer and each of us gets quality one on one time with our kids.
    Enjoy the Night of Didier!
    Love the choice of name by the way. LOL. You crack me up ...

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  2. Awww how lovely for Didier!!! I'm sure whatever you do it will be memorable. We don't often get a lot of one on one times with the girls. When we do, it's precious :)

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  3. That's lovely, I'm sure young Didier will treasure it! Love the name choice!

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  4. Love you choice of name - I hope you have a smashing time !! I have nothing to offer having only one child xox

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  5. Ahh that is lovely for him. The middle kids do feel like they miss out don't they. I hope you have an awesome night!

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  6. it is always special I am sure when it's one child and the parents. I am glad you sought the opportunity as you say, when they're teens they come few and far! Denyse #teamIBOT

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  7. What a great thing to do. Two of our three are twins so they have never ever been apart. I will need to talk to them about whether they would like a night of didier!

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  8. That's so lovely. We only have the two, both now grown and one has moved out of home. So these days I get more excited when I get to see them BOTH!

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  9. Finding one on one time can be tough with a few kids at home. I really enjoy it as much as they do, because it's so rare. I'm sure whatever you do it will be just perfect. x

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  10. When my babies were little I tried really hard to have one on one and they loved it. It seems to happen now but not often planned . Nice when it all works out

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  11. Party time! We use to try and do this with our girls. Although with no camp or family nearby it was more a case of one would come shopping or walking with me while hubby minded the other two.

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  12. What a lovely idea. I only have one child so this isn't an issue for me, but I am the eldest of three and growing up, I definitely think my middle brother missed out. I was the oldest and the only girl, and so had certain privileges because of that, and the youngest was the baby of the family, but the middle one was just sort of stuck in between. This is a lovely way of making him feel special. #StayClassyMama

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  13. That is so sweet. Hope the night went well as I'm chiming in late.

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  14. That's a great choice of name and I am sure there will be a great choice of activity too! I'm an only child of a single parent and I've always been very grateful that I got so much "mum and me" time. Enjoy those special moments!

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  15. That's so sweet. I currently have a three year old, an almost two year old and I am due to give birth to our third in less then 10 weeks. I am concerned about how much 'one-on-one' time I will get with them all as they get older.

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  16. Enjoy! I am sure "Didier" will treasure the night when he has you all to himself!

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  17. I hope you all enjoy your festival of Didier. What an awesome thing to do!

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  18. Aw I'm sure he'll love being the centre of attention for once! I only have the one child so she's totally used to having our full undivided attention - have a great day and night with him x #KCACOLS

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  19. We only have one child, so I guess he gets all the attention. I hope your son has a wonderful night and you enjoy the time together!

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  20. So sweet! And something I need to do more of as it's hard juggling my 4 - 6yo girl, 4yo boy and 2yo twins. I am often battling the guilts that we usually only manage 2 on 1 time. xx

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  21. As the middle child myself I know how he feels! The one on one time is rare - as a teenager I used to choose to go to the supermarket with my mum purely because I knew my siblings wouldn't come and we could be alone. I hope you guys all have a fun night! #KCACOLS

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  22. Hope it was a good time. These are important times to try and keep communication lines open and keep them on "your side" As you say, moody times ahead #KCACOLS

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  23. I just have arthur at the moment, but we would like another. I have signed arthur up to preschool for 3 hours in a morning ( just 2 days a week) starting next year so that when another comes along I will get some 1 to 1 time like I have been able to give arthur. I think it can be really hard to get the balance right - especially with a middle child. sounds like a lovely evening and something you should definitely do again if you can.Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next Sunday

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  24. I was the last of three and loved having one on one time with my folks when my brother and sister got older and were doing their own thing. #KCACOLS

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  25. This is absolutely beautiful! I'm off to read post 2 to see what you guys got up to :)

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  26. That's so sweet, how happy he is to have some time with you! My husband and I do try to get one on one time with each of our children when we can, but it's not easy. x #KCACOLS

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  27. Love this! I'm so glad you get to have a day with your middle child. It sounds like he is as excited as you are. If it were me I would definitely go to Sushi Train, I love sushi soooooo much lol. Hope you had a great night! Thanks for making me smile and sharing with #StayClassyMama!

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  28. Aww this is so sweet..I hope you enjoy the might of didier! So sweet he wants you to take him to school. Enjoy your quality time xx #fortheloveofBLOG

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  29. How lovely! I hope that 'Night of Didier' is one you won't forget.
    Stopping by from #MummyMondays

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