Over the years I've become quite used to being the odd man out, fish out of water and so on. I've become quite comfortable being the oldest person in the room, ignoring looks or comments. If that's the price of a good time then so be it.
However, a friend really pushed me to my limit. After the elation of Palm Trees festival, we were both seeking to repeat the endorphin high. So she suggested Garden Party, an event at Ivy. I pointed out that this would not be like a festival, and even with a ticket they wouldn't let us in because we were old and bringing the vibe down. (They'd make up an excuse to do with what we were wearing but it would be literally our faces or bodies that were the problem). I suggested we see someone at Liberty Hall because they wouldn't care and it would be dark and so on. I thought we were in agreement.
Then she rang and said "I got us tickets to Garden Party".
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| Linking this photo with #RubyTuesdayToo & #BlueMonday |
So I spent a good month workshoping with anyone young what I could wear and how to avoid the humilation of being denied entry for being us. I had seen this post by the fabulous Iris Apfel, where she said you needed to get comfortable outside your comfort zone. So when my friend told me I didn't have to come if I really didn't want to (because I was banging on about the drama ahead), I said i would go and if we were turned away, we'd go and grab a cocktail somewhere and laugh about it.
In the end, as I had zero vaguely appropriate clothes (and had to wear sneakers if going to dance for 6 hours), I opted for my normal plain attire, dressed for invisiblity & comfort.
We went for lunch and some cocktails before hand and then with some dutch courage, we headed to line up (and in my mind, certain humiliation). I was genuinely anxious about what they would say to us. However, as we reached the line, a man much older than us strolled up. Then more arrive. I said to my friend "Oh, we're golden. We're not even the oldest here".
We went in and danced our cares away. The Rave to the Grave crew suddenly making us socially accpetable and completely normal.
The moral is, there are more of you than you think, you just have to find your tribe.
The amount of time I spent preparing for insulting rejection in my head was absurd. I felt every inadequacy of appearance and ageing for weeks. I prepeared for a soul destroying humiliation, and felt the sting of it at times too. However, it never eventuated. Perhaps I have another lesson in that - to stop worrying in anticipation of a problem.
Ulimately, I learnt even though I do a lot of different things and have grown my confidence in many ways, I'm still cruising in my comfort zone. And there is a lot more fun once you push through....
“Coming out of your comfort zone is tough in the beginning, chaotic in the middle, and awesome in the end, because in the end, it shows you a whole new world. Make an attempt.”
— Anonymous
And so I have another ticked off the list....
Torshlusspanik List:
2. Fencing (check)
3. Play croquet at Croquet Club
4. Laser skeet
5. Off road buggy driving
6. Play Assassins Creed
7. Jetpacking (check)
8. The Color Run (check)
9. Invent something
10. Cooking Masterclass (check)
11. Master a Masterclass (check)
12. Perform a rap song (check)
13. Trampoline adventure (check)
14. BMX Riding (check)
15. Do a cart wheel (check)
16. Ride an Electric Bike (check)
17. Astonish Myself
18. Write a book.
19. Participate in a distance event (check)
20. Climb Sydney Tower (check)
21. Dance in a dance class (check)
22. Trust a stranger
