“You’ll never find a rainbow if you’re looking down.” ― Charlie Chaplin

GRATITUDE: I am struggling a bit to find inspiration to write. Both fiction and for the blog. I have a break coming up for a writing competition so I'm trying to wait a few more weeks before hitting pause. Thus I am grateful to Denyse for putting out this structure for a post a few weeks back, and I am falling into it's formal structure for the second month. Some times it's the tiniest of things that we are grateful for.

LOVE: My eldest is coming on a small weekend holiday with us in January - just three nights but it will be so lovely to have my family of five all together again. Our middle child was out for dinner with friends this week and I realised the sad little trio at the table was soon to be the new family dynamic. It's normal, and a good sign but sad ofr those left behind. And I've been aware for years that our youngest would become an only child but it's still sad to see that it's here, ust on the horizon.

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HEALTH: I got a covid test in order to visit a centenarian safely last week, and I've been aware of 'symptoms' ever since, so I know it's all in my head When my eldest moved out, I've been clearing out all the stuff that was left behind, and that has lead the other two to follow suit with the toys and books they've outgrown. This has lead to me cleaning years with of dust at the back of bookshelves and draweres and often discovering I have a 'stuffy' nose. I then wonder if I need another test...or how long do I wait to get another test. I would love to stop being so hyper aware & question every little 'symptom'. I suspect this is my 'new normal' for awhile.

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CONNECTION: Since we came out of lockdown, I have seen all the elderly in my orbit - Grandmother and mother in law, my mother twice, my 98 year old former neighbour (who I rang as soon as the test results came in and announced I was coming over for a visit 'right now' as I'm as germ-free as I'll be because once the schools go back, I'll be high risk.  I've seen both book clubs in person, mah jong and a couple of nights out with friends. It's weird to see people, in the sense it feels as if nothing has happened and we haven't been shut off from the world for 4 months. 

APPRECIATION: All the eased restrictions and what it means we can do. I am booking tickets to plays and concerts, music bingo (for 'you have to stay in your chair' dancing) and even a boat day being planned. I am making the most of what I can, while I can. Even if we don't go into lockdown again, we will have rolling '6 day isolations' from the schools,  but until we do, I'm not wanting to waste a minute!

CARE: I am a little worried about seeing the elderly- my mum in our weekly visits in particular, now both kids are back at school. They are mixing with large groups of kids from all over Sydney (and beyond) each day and as we're all vaxxed, what if we have it asymptomatically? When those home tests come in, I'll just by a stack of those to do before visiting but for now, it does make me uneasy. How are people managing it overseas?

MEMORIES:  All our holidays keep popping up on my facebook,giving me itchy feet to start planning. All the toys and books we are discarding in the clean up are flooding me with memories of time spent reading favourite stories of playing with much loved toys.  They are making their way to the fence for others to love and enjoy.  It's a sad process for me, in a way. Those days are over, just memories.

The images are not related, but are many colours of the rainbow.

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